SMALL GROUP CONDITIONING
When the roles are taken up by each parent, they are conventional roles as dictated by society that fall within the mechanics of the Penta. Instead of having the couple of Individual A and Individual B, the roles with the first child create Family A and Family B where the original couple entity dissolves. The individual’s understanding of their world comes from their childhood upbringing, their family environment, their culture, their faith, their community, for good and for bad. This is what conditioned them and the world they know is what was presented to them. This then represents their values and moralities that are ingrained. This is not the life you were designed to individually live but we all have this conditioning as a starting point through which we measure the world we know. It is true that a child will not often parent in the same way that they were parented. This is generational in adaptation to the times we live in, yes, but it also comes with an awareness of who they are or what they were taught does not apply to the life they are currently living. Something is missing, there could be an identity crisis and feeling their life may lack purpose. We all go through a deconditioning process and like their parents “will do the best with what they could and what they had.” This is not about blame, it is about awareness. So additional tensions can arise due to the Penta configuration as the 2 families can often have very different values, traditions, culture etc. Family A does not have primary concern for Individual B and Family B does not have primary concern for Individual A. This is why “blood is thicker than water.” It can also bring two very different parenting styles for good and for bad. Sometimes difference brings a different perspective that can be quite beneficial when one parenting style is not working. Again awareness and communication between parents is key. Either way, the Penta creates a moral glue through the children for couples to “stick it out” despite the challenges that family life presents. From my personal experience, I have worked with clients that had been involved in “arranged” marriages. It had been presented to me that the success rate was higher in arranged verses traditional marriages that were less culturally based. This is the classic Program and Penta at work to make sure couples stay together to raise the dependent child to the point of independence. This is not just a glue but a “super-glue” because the Program’s (life’s) ability to impart a greater sense of morality and responsibility onto the couple. Maybe the success rate is seemingly higher as should there be separation, the greater possibility for vilification and out-casting may be present depending on the strictness of their traditions.